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Saturday, September 26, 2009'♥


i am holding on.

i dont know why.

i know it wont work,

i know you want me to move on.

but i really cant.

m stubborn mayb?

but m stil hoping.

:S

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'♥

sorry.

n

thank you !

thanks to all my frens who r there for me
thanks for ur listning ears
thanks for being there
thanks for caring for me

thank u daddy mummy too.
i rily dono y my life is so messed up!!
how i wish i could just b a normal child, that grows up just the way u wan me to.
i don wan to gv u all trouble.
m sorry things were just not the way i tot it could b. .
i wil try

m quite bad in handling life, haha
quite useless...
wads the point of knowing how to study??
hmm.. i dono
i will learn :)!


anyway thanks :)



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Thursday, September 24, 2009'♥

在我的人生里,
我经历了不少事情. .

我受过了老师对我的侮辱,

我曾被朋友冷落,
甚至过着每天孤独的日子,
被人讨厌的日子,
看别人的脸色,
被自己以为是朋友的叛朋友背叛,

这些, 我都熬过去了啊!

那我应该更坚强的不是吗?

可我却从来都没有像现在那么难过.

这几个月来, 我没有一天是真正开心的,
与朋友出门, 他们笑, 我就跟着笑. .
其实我都不知道他们在笑什么. .
我也只有带着面具过我的日子. .
带着那微笑的面具, 里头的我却总是泪流满面的. .
也许是我没用吧?
我真的无法不去想它. . .
我到底该怎么做?
又有谁愿意一直在我身边听我唠叨?
我自己也不想去打扰别人..
毕竟每一个人都有自己的烦恼啊. . .

说出来, 自己也没有很好受,
又增加了别人的负担,
这种事做来干吗?
自己不开心就算了,
我不想连累别人. . .

唉,
我真的不知道,
到底是我要得太多, 还是我无理取闹?
当我不想说的时候,
你又要一直问,
当我找到机会说的时候,
你却选择在我说一半的时候走人.
我想我所说的问题, 对我来说是很大的问题,
为什么对你却好像什么都不是?
甚至可以若无其事, 做你最爱做的事?
我真的很累了,
我已经说了很多次了. .
既然你可以这样, 证明了我根本就不如你的游戏.

难道我真的那么不值得让你放下你的游戏 一会儿?
如果真的是酱,
我到底算什么?
草吗?
我看连草好像都不如. .

难道你酱对我,
我没有权利生气吗?
你竟然还能对我发脾气!

气就气! 我不会再像个笨女人跟你低声下气了!
我已经受够了!




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'♥

DAMN U OH YOU WHOEVER INVENTED DOTA!

YOU are the one who cause all this.

YOU are the one who cause all the arguments we had.

YOU freakin screwed up my life.

I HATE U!

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Wednesday, September 23, 2009'♥

我好累了.
我骗自己, 骗别人, 伪装得累死了.

我, 真的满足了.
酱就够了.
真的. .
我不管酱能维持多久,
我真的要的就只是这样. .

我那么努力要放开, 可是,
就算放开了我也不开心. .
那又何必?

顺其自然吧?

我不要再装了,
我只要快乐啊!
真的那么难吗?
我不要累了!
我要好好地活下去!

但是我还是需要你. .
需要你给我的力量. .
我只求你不要抛弃我, 不要让我独自承担 ( 至少现在不要. . .)
那是我对你的唯一要求. .

(:



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Tuesday, September 22, 2009'♥



you make me smile (:
thank you!

我的开心,
原自于你给我的力量.
(:

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'♥


This beautiful song is that one song that keeps me strong in every situation.
it reminds me of God's love for me, n that HE cares for me.

i know that i'm not facing all these alone =)
be my guide o Lord!
"cast all your anxiety on HIM because he cares for you "
1 Pet 5:7

Our God is far greater than words can make known,
Exalted and holy, He reigns on His throne,
In infinite splendour He rules over all,
Yet He feeds the poor sparrows
and He knows when they fall.

His power is great and will ever endure,
His wisdom is peaceable, gentle and pure.
But greater than all these glories i see,
is the glorious promise that He cares for me.

He rides the wide heavens, He strides through the sea,
The high mountains tremble to hear His decree.
His voice with great thundering sounds from above,
but to His own children, He whispers His love.

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Monday, September 21, 2009'♥


这几个月以来,
我其实都没有很开心.
我有很努力啊!
怎么就是不行啊?

本来是有好很多的了,
但是回到了我最爱的家,
这一切的一切又回到了原点.

这一切的一切为什么又要重现?
我不要酱啦! :(
我也想要往前走出啊!
谁不要啊??!
你以为酱过日子很爽吗?
可你就一直出现. . 无论我做什么, 都会莫名其妙的和你有关.
很讨厌啦!

杨思敏, 你很笨咧!
可是又不是我想要的! :(
可我就是做不到啊!
我忘不了啊!
我知道我很没用啦. .
可我又能怎样?


" 忘不了的就不要勉强自己忘记,
把这一切埋在心底最深处. .
让它成为你最美丽的回忆. ."

我希望我能做到.

我说过, 你给的, 是我这一生中最美的. .
我谢谢你, 谢谢你给我的一切. .
你给了我曾经的幸福,
虽然短暂, 但是对我来说, 已经够了.
:)

幸福, 让人觉得安全, 温暖. .
但却有如履薄冰的恐慌,
好象随时都会消失. .

那我应该珍惜眼前的幸福吧!
我会努力的!

我希望我能打从心底开心起来
:)






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Thursday, September 17, 2009'♥

SIGHS!
how can i b so noob??
i should b at home nowwww!!!
T.T

tml's class all cancel..

somebody tell me..

y m i still in VISTA KOMANWEL!

OMG!

T.T

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Sunday, September 13, 2009'♥

sighs.

bout to
break
cry
n
die.

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Saturday, September 12, 2009'♥

人类. . .
愚蠢的思想. . .

得不到的永远是最好的. .

却句句属实. . .

: /

的确有够笨..

我忘了, 我也是人. . .


:S


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Thursday, September 10, 2009'♥

在你心中有這樣的一個人嗎?


你們可能相愛過,你們也可能喜歡著彼此,
但是,為了什麼原因你們沒能在一起?


也許他為了朋友之間的義氣,不能追你。

也許為了顧及家人的意見 ,你們沒有在一起。

也許為了出國深造,他沒有要你等他。

也許你們相遇太早,還不懂得珍惜對方。

也許你們相見太晚,你們身邊已經有了另一個人。

也許你回頭太遲,對方已不再等待。

也許你們彼此在捉摸對方的心,而遲遲無法跨出界線。

不過即使你們沒在一起,你們還是保持了朋友的關係。

但是你們心底清楚,
對這個人,你比朋友還多了一份關心。
即使不能跟他名正言順的牽著手逛街,
你們還是可以做無所不談的朋友。

他有喜歡的人,你口頭上會幫他追,
心裡卻不是很清楚--
你是不是真的希望他追到。

他遇到困難時,
你會盡你所能的幫他,
不會計較誰又欠了誰。

男女朋友吃醋了,
你會安撫他們說你和他只是朋友--
但你心中會有那麼一絲的不確定。

每個人這輩子,
心中都有過這麼一個特別的朋友,
很矛盾的行為。

一開始你不甘心只做朋友的,
但久了,突然發現這樣最好。
你寧願這樣關心他,
總好過你們在一起而有天會分手。

你寧願做他的朋友,
彼此不會吃醋,
才可以真的無所不談。

特別是這樣,你還是知道,
他永遠會關心你的。
做不成男女朋友,
當他那個特別的朋友,有什麼不好呢?

很多的感情,
都因為一廂情願,
最後連朋友都當不成了,常常覺得惋惜。

可惜一些本來很好的友情,
最後卻因為對方的一句喜歡你,
如果你沒有反應,
這一段友情似乎也難以維持下去。

因為這就像是一場賭注,
表白了之後不是成了男女朋友,
這也難怪有些人會因此不肯踏出這一步。
要不就連朋友都當不成了。

有些事不是你能預料的,
或許對方不在意,你們還可以是朋友,
但卻已經不如從前的好。

也是可惜,也是遺憾.....

但還有沒有可能是另一種情況

你可能永遠都不甘心只是朋友

在你心中的,有沒有這么一位特別的朋友


此刻....你心中想的那個人是誰呢?

=/

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Wednesday, September 09, 2009'♥


LIFE is not life,
when there are no DOWNS in ur life.
i don go on blaming ppl, blaming God,
for everything that does not come my way.

i just cant seem to move on.

LIFE
goes on,
whether u're happy or u're sad.

you only have life once in a lifetime,
why on earth make it a sad life?

live your life happily lar!!

ha, well said.

but its...

easier said than done.



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'♥

u're just somebody who i thought i knew.



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Tuesday, September 08, 2009'♥

hohoho...
somebody came to me n say
" i want to be in the animal family..!!!"
n since tt somebody looks abit like penguin...
so there, another new member!!! penguin aka wuhterng or better knows as aipok!
hee, hope we can b close frens for s long s it could be! :)
sorry wei ren.. i cant find fishball!!!
but don worry!! u will forever b our best food!! hahahaha..
never will b forgotten!!
:P

lala.. i nid to study la, but i cant. =.=

animal family rox!
(say we childish oso nvm! XD)

bb!

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Saturday, September 05, 2009'♥

dear mousie,
too bad we cant sent u off..
do take care as u leave to UK and have a new start!
i hope u are able to get back ur momentum of studying after slacking for erm.. almost a year!
anyway, don emo ya :) dragon, kitty, tortoise wil be here for u always !!
we'll definitely miss you to the max!
so come back soon!
and take care of yourself when u're out there!
and lastly, have fun studying there and don forget us huh!! :)
i know u don dare de la, if not i expel u! hiaks!
i don even know what time is your flight, cant call u.
sobs.
keep in touch !!
and dont go MIA again and again and again!

XOXO,

dragon :)

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'♥



I
have
a
new
hobby!!

which is capturing all the nice moments with hor's DSLR!

and, am now very addicted to it.

sad to say, it is a too expensive hobby,
so i'm going to leech on hor's camera.. :)
well i need to help him utilise his camera ma !!

here are some of my products.. !!
( for the rest, wait for hor to upload in fb ba! )



















i personally love this the most! hehe..

still! i am not as half talented as my sis is..
T.T

still learning!
:)

arr.. time to slp!!
bb


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Tuesday, September 01, 2009'♥



-31082009-

this day,
is the day that all msians will remember,
without this day,
there will b no malaysia,
but, this is not very important also!!! XD

here comes the more important wan...

WITHOUT THIS DAY!!

u know what a big difference it would make to this world????

so BIG TIL U CANOT C!

haha. cos without this day, there wil b no ME!

y is it so?

becos this day

is the day which a very magnificent, gorgeous, pretty, adorable, capable, coolest woman was born....
she is my.....

MUMMY!!!!! =D

happy bday mummy!!

usually we will celebrate mum's bday in the hotel in jb ( yea. n my house is in jb XD). but since m in kl, so no point them celebrating in jaybee without me! so of cos, they have to come up to kl.. hiaks!! evil smile =]

we stayed at the KL plaza apartment for a night and berjaya times hotel for another night.
so fun hor check in n check out n check in n check out again! =.=

anyway.
things that we did are:
29-08-2009
1.visit grandparents and brought them for dinner

2.sleep in the hotel. ( that's wad my parents owaz do)

3.eueu zombie-ing using mama lappie.

4.me emo-ing n studying in the room. ( which i walk up n down in n out every 5 min)

5. everybody went to sleep while i watch my belle's magical world n fell asleep in like 10 mins.

30-08-2009

woke up bout 9 ++
pack stuff n check out!
den off we go to check in at berjaya times hotel.
this is so lame. =.=||

BUT BERJAYA TIMES HOTEL IS LIKE SO DAMN AWESOME!!!

things we did:
1. check out the room( which is so awesome! )

in the lift! super love berjaya time. cos there is just so many mirrors all over the place!
best place for camwhoring hiaks =]




(note wad's daddy doing back there! ha)



we cant resist!! taking pics non stop. XD


2. went to low yat plaza - breakfast n shop around there. . . (I BOUGHT DRAGON EGG!)

3. sungei wang! - shop for clothes which i forget where the shop was, so walk here n there like headless snakes. keke.

4. back to awesome hotel n sleep!

5. watched aladdin 3 wit eueu den again i fell asleep.

6. Midvalley this time, had dinner there, shop for mama's purse which is also her prezzie =)
( n i accidentally bought a bag XD)

during dinner. XD

7. back to hotel, conference abit.. ( chat onli la! )

den when the clock strikes 12,
cinderella...
oops wrong story.. XD
we wished mama happy bday!! n gave mama the prezzies..

me, eu, esther, cl, jh, dan ( my mum suddenly got 6 children when she only suffered twice!)
got mum a big big cup n a card which i made! =]

eueu drew a big rose which i din take pic of it. sorry eu.. T.T

our present!

happy happy mummy!

with her super nice hubby and my super handsome daddy!

daddy's present for mummy!


me n mummy!


n daddy!

den everyone went to sleep again.
me n eu continue the belle's magical world. n again i stil din finish the show! =.=

31082009

woke up, pack up, had to leave the awesome place, went to grandparents place, had lunch, say bye, back to the v-not-nice-home in vista, say bye to daddy mummy sis and kakak. n there..
happiness is gone. T.T
......................................................................................................................................

later in the afternoon, i met a new fren!! hahaha..
nice to meet u ying zhao aka so po =]
so po used to b me but nvm.. i gv u!!
together wit siao po, we all went to MV again.. -.-

had dinner, had ice-cream,
watched imagine that.

imagine that is nice, touching and a rily good movie :)

watch it.



hehe n i met xiao bai! go out nv call me! fren til todae lo! XD

tt's all i guess.

:)


oh ya, how can i forget
happy 52th bday
MALAYSIA!

1 malaysia o.. kaka
hopefully it wil come true la

:)

p/s: notice there's no cake, come to think bout it, we nv had cakes during mum's bday. haha




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'♥

-__-
m in the midst of losing the most important thing in my life.
i hate to c it happen.
i don wan it to happen.

but WHY!?

m confused.

=[

T.T

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